Life After She Left

yeah, i’ve been gone FOREVER. I’ve been busy at work and being in love.

by the way, does anyone want to know what happens in True Blood? it was a TV show I’ve been working on non-stop.

people probably don’t care, lol, I only just started watching it because I worked on it, but apparently lots of people LOVE it…

its been MONTHS since i’ve been on my tumblr and i remember when I used to scroll through I used to think about my ex. Everything reminded me of her. but I don’t feel anything anymore. I just look at them and say, “ahh thats a good quote,” or “wow, that’s so true.” Instead of thinking, “I miss her,” or “I was an idiot to lose her.” I do think of her from time to time, and at first I think I miss her, but when I really think about it, I’m glad its over. It was something I had to do in my life and now I can live and say that I’ve done it.

My life is different now and I think I like it… I’m a whole person again.

is it just me or does the word “swag” confuse anyone else?

I thought SWAG stood for “stuff we all get” as in the free giveaway crap they throw at you like flyers or hats or t-shirts.

now, “swagger” is something like the way someone carries themselves, their “jua de vive”, their personality, their magnetism or their electricity.

can’t help but feel a little annoyed seeing this… maybe not as annoyed as when i see “yolo” but luckily none of my friends ever post that…

not a big deal i guess, just confusing and maybe a little annoying…

I’ve got to say that just being in this new relationship… its just so great to be in a full, loving, fresh relationship. we care for each other so much. Its just so “uhm… duhh you’re the person I’m going to spend the rest of my life with.”

such a strange thing, my friend (of whom is my supervisor) invited me to go with him to see Battleship spontaneously last night. We had a quick bite to eat before and we talked about work. It was light and humorous, but then after the movie I got home and talked to my girlfriend and I just felt so bummed out about what I’m doing for a living now. I just get very little recognition and very little benefit from it; other than a paycheck every two weeks (not even a great pay check: barely a living wage).

On my drive in I can’t help but see all the 5 series BMWs and the E class Mercedes Benzes and just feel like I’mNEVERgoing to get there  =(   I’ve only been working in this field for just over two years and though I seem to be picking up it pretty well (there’s hardly anything that they give me that I can’t solve on my own), I just can’t see myself excelling more than some of the stronger guys or the guys that have been around longer; I’m feeling a little stuck.

I do have a little glint of hope because of this new company  that my brother-in-law is getting involved with and I would be a senior producer and create marketing materials and campaigns for them over the course of months… and get paid just under $200k a year… a far cry from my miserable $56,000 right now.